Bittersweet
by homra-kid
Summary: Being only fifteen, they weren't wrong in being afraid about Eren's pregnancy but now that they realized the state of their situation, they were terrified to do what they knew was the right thing for themselves and for the sake of the war against the Titans. For humanity's last hope for survival… Trigger warnings! and Jean x fem!Eren. Be prepared!


**A/N: **Don't ask me where I come up with this stuff because even I don't know. I really, really don't know... xAx

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It was an accident they supposed but accidents like this should have been preventable—they should have known better, Levi chides them but there isn't much they can do other than swallow down their pride and wait after dark to be escorted to the nearest hospital under the cover of night.

When they arrived at the deserted infirmary, Jean squeezed Eren's hand tightly in his own, feeling her body shake with nervous anticipation. Being only fifteen, they weren't wrong in being afraid about Eren's pregnancy but now that they realized the state of their situation, they were terrified to do what they knew was the right thing for themselves and for the sake of the war against the Titans. For humanity's last hope for survival…

No one told them outright, but it was heavily implied that for Eren—no, for everyone involved to be more specific, the baby would be a hindrance to their legions plans to reclaim the walls and the Shiganshina district.

"I'll schedule an appointment with a friend of mine. He's a doctor and can be trusted." Commander Erwin told them earlier in his office and now here the couple were, tired and consumed with regret at what they were about to do.

"If we survive this war, we'll try again..." Jean whispered in her ear. "We'll be better prepared and ready..."

"How can you say it like that Jean? It's so unlike you..." Eren replied, her bright green eyes staring down intently at the flatness of her stomach. It was much too early to tell but even so she could feel it, their child growing inside of her, the child they were about to terminate.

"We'll live through this, Eren..." Jean assured her. "We're going to survive and when we do, when it's all over we're going to have a family—you and I. We'll travel in a wagon, and we'll raise our kids on the road so that they'll see the world we fought to liberate from the titans."

"You're starting to sound more and more like me..." Eren said smiling sadly. "Should I be worried?"

"No, you should feel flattered because you're growing on me." He snapped, taking her face into his hands as her rubbed the pad of his thumb against her cheek. "This kid we have right not, I won't let them die in vain..." He said, finally tearing up.

Slowly, Eren pressed forward and embraced him tightly, she too, crying silently beside him. No matter how ready she was to fight the titans, to protect humanity, this wasn't something she'd been ready to give up so soon after finding out. There was no mistake how happy she'd been, how selfish she felt for that single moment but the world was a cruel place and everything concerning their survival were all stacked against her.

Hours later, long after it was all over, Eren felt empty as she curled into her bed. Even if it was the woman's barracks, Jean still took the risk and snuck into her bed, holding her body tightly to his. Mikasa was well aware of what had happened, and under normal circumstances would have thrown the boy out of their room but Eren needed him so she didn't protest.

By the time morning settled in, the sun rising over the scout's headquarters, Eren was back, training like a mad man and Jean and a handful of others stood as far away from her as she seethed inside from her loss and was taking all of her frustrations out on the field dummy. Watching the teen viciously slash off the wooden head from the titan dummy and shatter her blades in the process, they could only feel relieved that it wasn't them being hacked to pieces by their temperamental shifter.

"I'll make the titan's pay… they'll pay for everything they've done…" She snarled angrily after dinner and only Jean was there to hear her say this as he held her close. Yes, she was back to her usual self alright, only she was angrier than ever now and it seemed that only he could understand her, let alone control her in this state of mind.

And she did make them pay, she made them pay dearly one after another. When Jean had been in danger, just a moment away from being snatched up off his horse and eaten alive, Eren flew into a wild rage and dismembered the fifteen meter titan in her own form. She kept at it, protecting Jean and keeping him within her sights at all times. And when it was over, when they overthrew the monarchy, put Historia on the throne and destroyed all trace of the titans, Eren yanked Jean down to her level by the front of his uniform and kissed him passionately in front of everyone.

The Scouting Legion and everyone else could only imagine what happened next and soon after, at twenty years old, the couple were the first to volunteer for the unit being sent out to explore the lands outside of the walls. Even if Eren was pregnant a second time and made everyone apprehensive about traveling in her condition, she insisted over and over again that she'd be fine.

And she was, incredibly so and Jean was proud of how strong she held herself up in front of everyone. Though she was more of a maid for the group on their travels, taking on tasks fit for a house wife, she took her job seriously and avidly, even commenting one day that it was practice for when Jean and her would settle down and own a house in the future. It left the man sputtering of course but he took it in stride because in the end, it was what they planned to do, just not right now and Connie took to teasing him whenever the opportunity presented itself as well as Sasha.

Nine months spent seeing the mountains, the forest, wild animals, lakes, rivers and finally the sea, Eren at long last gave birth to a healthy bouncing baby girl with light ash brown hair and bright green eyes.

"I want to name her Carla, after my mother." She declared, and there was no way Jean was going to object to that. Not when he'd already called dibs on naming their son (that's if they had one) after Marco.

Carla Petra Kirstein was everything they'd hope for and even more as they immersed her in their surroundings outside of the walls. She was rebellious and very loud for an infant, making it very clear just who her parents were and she seemed to like it very much when Eren carried her, ankles deep in water. When they returned to Trost in Wall Rose after a year and a half away, of course Jean's mother rejoiced at finally having grandchildren.

"It took you long enough." She said, coddling the little girl and the couple flushed darkly at her comment, clearly embarrassed but not enough to feel shameful. "Thank goodness I was able to survive to see this day." She added with a sigh of relief and kissed Carla's temple.

That same day, Jean's mother had their daughter sleep in her room instead and with them finally alone, Jean pinned Eren down gently against his mattress. "I want another kid." He said boldly, his body hovering above hers and it was only a stroke of luck that the titan shifter didn't headbutt him in retaliation for being so embarrassingly straightforward.


End file.
